The One Who Feeds the Sparrow
Hi.. just in case you are wondering who this cute little boy is, its none other than yours truly.See that spinky brownish hair? Well, fortunately hair did eventually grown and turn black. See that squinty small eyes? Well, I still have them... still working on trying to make them bigger everyday (though in vain). See that cute bunny teeth? Well, they eventually fell out and the front teeth I have now are new ones... See that goofy smile? Well, I think (and seriously hope i'm correct) that its gone by now.... See that shirt? Gone obviously.....
So thats me, when I was... I duno... 2 or 3? Something like that. What do you think? Cute? People asked me a lot why my hair was brown and not black back then.
I used to be my mommy's boy. Everyone would say I looked like her..... She would keep on telling me I will grow up to be a handsome boy, and that in the future many girls would come after me; 2 predictions I'm still waiting to come true (hahaha.. )
Do you believe in God? Sometimes, when life gets so challenging and difficult, its hard to believe there really is someone up there watching over you and caring for you. At times when you are feeling down, and there just seems to be no way out to the problem, you wonder what He is doing up there. Most of the times, we do what we feel is right, based on our own reasoning and logic. Which isnt really that bad, when you think about it. Whats wrong with acting based on your own sound judgement right? Whats wrong in toughening yourself, believing in yourself and trusting that what you do will bear fruit because you have a mind for it?
Only thing is, look at that picture. Who created that cute little me? How did my mother do this amazing and miraculous feat of giving birth to an entirely new life being? Yes, its biology 101, but who created it? Is life and the creation of new life a purely coincidental thing? Or does it just happen? How many would answer yes? I think deep down, we all have a built in intrinsic belief that there is a God. We acknowledge that our life itself is not a creation of chance, but by deliberate design.... If you have children, look at your children, if you have siblings look at them, isn't it amazing? We all would freely say that child birth is an accepted miracle. We acknowledge it as something extraordinary and miraculous. We know it is a gift, a gift of life. We give high honour and respect to the mother who bears the pain and delivers the child, but we thank and attribute it as a gift from someone, and that someone is God.
We acknowledge that it is by act of God that life is brought into this world. But sometimes, we fail to bring that into our own lives, to acknowledge that he not only brings life into this world, but also sustains it. Seldom do we look to God for guidance and strength. Only when things go beyond our own strength do we suddenly think about God again and ask for some help. Worst, of all, even in asking for help from God, we tend to ask for what we want to come true, in other words, that our will be done. We seldom, if ever stop to ask what perhaps God wants for us; which is unsurprising, since to many, God is not a feasible or ever present entity, but some belief in some vague higher power that is supposed to be there, but never really there.
Do you believe in God? I do. I come to realise that nothing I have done, nothing I have achieved, nothing of who I am is because of my own self. People praise me for the strength to continue with my family crisis, but I asked myself when did I ever have such strength? People tell me I am smart and well spoken, but since when was I ever such things? The truth is, I am none of it. I do not feel proud of all the pain, sufferings and achievements alike. On the contrary, I feel humbled, that I someone managed, not by my own will and strength but through support from God. He didnt send a saviour to me to rescue me from financial burdens or things like that; but at times when things are down, your heart feels black and there's no way out, you find yourself having the strength to go one, despite everything... thats when you know God is working on you.. from within.
My heart is disturbed by these recent news and events on my mother.... but when i looked at this picture, i remember that through no small feat my mother gave birth to me. As frail a woman as she is, she made this miracle in me. The one that saw her through my birth, will see me through my ordeal, and see her through hers. It is our duty to do all that we can, to do what we know should be done.... but what man can plan, only God can see through. Man can brave their hearts and take the leap, but it is God who delivers.... in Him I will trust, because if I did myself, all hope would be lost. A friend wrote this for me to spur me on:
I don't know what may come tomorrow,
It may bring me poverty,
But the one who feeds the sparrow,
Is the one who stands by me.
posted by Compulsive Blogger @ 11:37 am
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