Incognito
It feels good walking out the street and being recognised by the people you meet here and there. We all know that its nice to be noticed, especially by people you dont really know personally. Its flattering when someone you dont know recognises you. It tells you that you are not invisible and that although you dont make a conscious effort to do so, your day goes by and someone somewhere has noticed and taken note of you.
Some people i know have never had this feeling of being noticed before, and of they have, it is all for the wrong reasons. They are made fun of, instead of noticed for their qualities. They are talked about, but only that they are such weird people and they look so pitiful. When you get to know them better, you find that they are actually very socialble. They initially come cross as difficult to have a conversation with but as you get to knwo them, they start to open up. They tell you that they are envious of people who are noticed immediately, of those who seem to have all the friends while they have to be contented with eating alone and having no conversations at all.
They look at the popular ones and ask, whyt am i not like that? the harder they try to, the further they are from becoming these people it seems. They suffer quietly, knowing that they are not noticed. It sounds pathetic why a person is so wanting and willing to be noticed by others, but we all know that it is a very important need to be fullfilled, to be taken note of and accepted by your peers and surroundings. No man is an island.
A make or break for most, the task of choosing your friends greatly influence the way you are and the waqy you will be. A man is what he says, does and doesnt do. Most dont think that their friends have a greater influence on them than they do on others, and they unconsciously feel that they are the more influential in a group whren in fact it is the opposite. therefore becoming a victim of their peers
For the unpopular ones, these seems even more overwhelming, because although they do not live up to the pressure, and they do not confirm to it, they feel guilty about it, that rather than making their own stand, they are instead not living up to expectations.
I dont really know whats the point of me writing these things, and i doubt if any of them makes any sense, but i am just thinking about a good friend, that very soon, i will be meeting a lot lesser, and wondering whether he will be ok in that new environment he is about to be in, whether or not he will be the same way as when i first met him, not knowing how to socialise and not knowing how to take care of himself and not be stepped over.
To my friend, good luck and stay sharp
He who laughs last...
its a common phrase people use.
He who laughs last... laughs best.
But i prefer
He who laughs last... thinks slowest or
He who laughs last... laughs alone or
He who laughs last... is faking it
the list could go on and on. Laughter, something we all can appreciate. To me, the harder you try to laugh, the harder it is and the more fake it sounds. Have you ever heard 'those' people who would laugh at just about anything another says, when we all know its just absolutely not funny at all? We all know that those ass kissers or "cha hai chai" (literally meaning shoe polishing guy) are all just trying gto suck up to whoever they can get their lips near to. I've stood on the sidelines for a long time and seen many of these 'ass kissers' (if i may so humbly call them) rise to the top of what they get involved it simply by putting on a fake smile and laugh so mechanical you just want to stuff millions of rotten eggs down their troat!..
But alas i also theres really nothing anybody can do about it right? theres no law saying 'ass kissers prohibited' so we'll have to live with them in the mean time.. or do we?...
Often enough, soon after people start noticing a particular ass kisser, the forms a secret pack between a few friends who will often observe Mr Ass Kissers every move and will faithfully condemn every single smile laugh and movement made by Mr Ass Kisser. Soon he is the most hated person around, and made even more so when his/her ass kissing works like a charm and he/she gets lots of praise and credit and the rest of us are questioned about our commitment! Whats worse, now that he's our superior, we all have to resort to kissing Mr Ass kissers ass instead if we are to have any hopes of getting ahead!... .
now, to kiss or not to kiss, that is the question. a double edge sword huh?
Some of these Mr Ass kissers, i know well, many are good friends. their defense is that its just a matter of good PR, some say its part of theJob. Others say its just their nature and some dont see anything wrong with just flattering a little bit. But what do you think? (yes, you) i would be absolutely humbled and honoured if anyone read this let alone replied me. So if you have something to say, just do it. Just dont start kissing my ass! ;>
Inside out
sometimes i feel that i am a different person on the outside that the one in. I am who i am, but there are some sides of me that never see the day of light, sides that i can never reveal to the people around me, because that is not the person they know. When we are so used to being a certain way, its hard for ourselves and other people to imagine us in a totally different way. And yet that 'darker' side of me still exist and is longing to be released, even if its just for a while.
We are all constrained by morale and social rule, and feel that we are somehow restricted by them, making us unable to express what we want or do as we please. Ironically these same morales keep society going and preventing us from totally forgetting all form of control.
I look for an outlet, not a place where i can totally disregard society or morals, just a place to at least release some forbidden desire and to be able to strike a balance, letting the inside out for a while, before my whole world becomes upside down..
