Fight on auntie!
When you grow up, your elders always seem larger than life. My father used to be the most knowledgeable person I knew. My mother used to be the most wonderful cook I knew. Maybe it was because she was the only cook I knew, but till today, only she knows how to cook dishes exactly the way I first tasted them as a kid, and it makes me all young and kiddy again.
After my father took us away from my mother, I stayed for almost 2 years with my aunt. She was my father’s eldest sister, and in my eyes, she was the fiercest, scariest person you could probably be under the care of. She ruled the house with an iron fist. We followed a strict regime of waking up at exactly 630am, to eat whatever breakfast she provided, to come home at 2pm, eat breakfast, take an afternoon nap (whether you like it or not), homework, TV, dinner, the off to bed). One look from her would be enough to strike fear into my cousins and I. In fear of the cane, we obeyed her at all cost, and when we did defy her, we did the best a 10 year old possible could do to cover his dirty tracks (which is not much by the way).
I moved away when I was 11 to stay with my father, who was more liberal and extremely lax in enforcing his house rules. After that, the only times I saw my aunt was during visits and Chinese new year. She seemed less and less intimidating as the years went by, maybe due to her aging, or that we were growing more into adults. It came to such a point where she no longer strike fear into me whenever I saw her.
I could see as the years go by that she was aging. Her temper has mellowed down significantly, and whenever I visited, she greeted us with friendliness; no longer shouting at us to wash our feet or stop talking while eating. I started to wonder just where had that fierce auntie of mine gone, the one that would strike fear into us with a mere look? What happened in between? It’s not like I was complaining, just curious that’s all. Living with the her of today would have been less an ordeal than it was when she was her old self.
But just last week, I discovered something. She had got the cancer. I was shocked. Cancer? You hear about these things all the time.. I mean ALL the time… some friends relative, some neighbour, some celebrity… but always to others.. to suddenly discover that someone in my own family had got the cancer really hit home for me. Worst of all, it was the auntie I grew up thinking was invincible, infallible and fierce. I have not had the chance to visit her, though when I do, I don’t even know what to say. What can I say? I’m sorry? The colon cancer is only first stage and she is receiving treatment… and I hope it goes well, but never the less… it’s a blow to our family. To have a family member with cancer is to mean you may be prone to it too.
Not well educated, will she be able to fully grasps the extent of her illness? Will she be able to learn all the can to fight back? Will she fight back? Surely she would, that fiery aunt of mine… but that was the old her. And for once, I wished that she was her former fighting and fearsome self again…
posted by Compulsive Blogger @ 10:44 am
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