Forthnights

How did it all happen?

Once upon a time, life really seemed like crap. Even now, it occasionally feels that way. But then, things happen and i am forced to look again and reconsider if my life is really that crappy. The way things have been turning out with my mother has really made me a happier person. The amazing part of it all is that, it all just sort of happen on its own, like chips falling into place. In the past, when we tried to do something to change the situation, it never worked out, but this time, it just happened. And there my mom is, right there at home , not 300kms away.

Another wonderful thing that happened within this 5 years is meeting my girlfriend. This year, we celebrated our 4th year of being together. But then i have never been sure if it just happened, or we sort of made it happen. For sure, this 4 years have not been easy with her. It really takes alot of sacrifice and hard work to make a relationship work. The part i am not sure of is at the start.

We met on a school trip. She was from a different school and we were put together in a group during the excursion. We hit it off immediately and chatted for the entire trip. By the end of the day, my friends were teasing me, betting that i would get her phone number. I knew i was attracted to this girl. There was someting very special about her. But i sort of had my pride to keep in front of my friends. I didnt want to come across as desperate. But i did feel desperate. Not to quickly get a girlfriend, but because i knew if i didnt do something NOW, i would most likely never meet this girl again! So i summed up the courage, swallowed my pride, and approached her for her number and took a picture of her. We kept in contact after that, but only got together a year later. Believe it or not, i actually asked her (to be my girlfriend) on our second date (which was only the 3rd time i met her) So , yeah love makes us do crazy things.

She likes asking me this question "It it was not me that came, but another girl on the day we met, would you have done what you did? Would you still have chased after her like you did me?" And i honestly have no answer to that! If it were some other pretty gal i met on that day, would SHE have become my girlfriend? I dont think so. But then again, if it was the same girl, and i didnt take the step of asking her out, would we have been together? I dont think so either. So in a way, the part im unsure about is this; On one hand, it seems like we were meant to meet on that day and to know each other. On the other hand, it seems like we would never have been together if i didnt boldly go up to her and ask her out.

Its ambiguous. Our destiny is in our own hands, but then it also happends according to its own course. She sometimes ask me "Do you think we are right for each other?" Sometimes, i wonder the same thing, ARE we right for each other? But then, somehow, i refuse to believe that we are all like puzzles, looking for our Mr or Ms Right that fits us perfectly, and if that person is not 'right' we move on continuing our search.

So i tell her "We are right for each other as long as you and I still want this relationship and are willing to work at it." I may be wrong in my conviction, seeing so many failed relationships around me, but for now, i remain an idealist.

posted by Compulsive Blogger @ 7:05 am Comments: 0