Found!
Sorry for not posting for such a long long time. It seems almost like I only start posting whenever there is some sort of update on my mother.
We found her...... or at least, we know where she is. We got a call from our auntie (her sister) up in Penang. She's in the hospital, in the general ward in our home town again. Still sketchy on the details, but she met some sort of accident and was admitted into hospital. I don't know if it is a serious or minor injury.. only that she is in hospital. I don't know if I should sight a sound of relief or worry again.
Just last week, after finally giving up hope that my mother would contact us, my brother and I made a missing person's report at the nearby police station. They could not believe that 2 sons would take a full 3 weeks to even before report that their mother was missing. I guess to a stranger hearing it for the first time, its hard to conceive why we could even wait so long. 24 hours they said, then you can straight away make missing persons report. Yes, but you don't know my mother. As we were making the report, my brother quietly said to me "Actually, I am a bit worry. She usually calls within a few days after leaving." ...... I looked at him and said I was more than a bit, I was VERY worried... and we crossed eyes for a few moments.. and in one of those rare show of emotions, I could see that my brother was feeling the same way I was. We both feared the worst... God knows what has happened this time.
I spent the last weeks talking a lot to my friend, and to my girlfriend, hearing my own words bouncing off them as I spoke.... and I sounded to myself as if everything was just another stranger episode in my life.. but that night making the police report, hearing my brother say exactly what was in my own heart, I knew there was no hiding how I truly felt any more. I was terrified and felt completely helpless. My thoughts started taking a life of its own. Where is she? Why hasn't she called? Is she even ALIVE? What if she got mugged / robbed again. Is she sleeping on the streets? What if she gets raped? Worst, what if she gets murdered and her body unidentified? The more I thought of it.. the more hopeless it started to feel. She almost always called after running away. This time it as different. It felt different... I started to asked around, asking my girlfriend (who is a nurse) how hospitals deal with un-identified corpses which were unclaimed....... wondering if she never turns up again, how would I even begin searching for her in hospitals? Its crazy thought I know, but it was something that seemed perfectly plausible given the circumstances. Our fears always play on our thoughts, and my worst fear was that I would loose my mother not only to death.. but to the unknown, never knowing where, when or how she was lost to me in this life.
Fast forward back to today, I received that call from my brother in the middle of dinner with my colleagues. We were all stuck in Bintulu again on our project. What should we do? he asked me. We discussed and my brother offered to drive up to find out what happened to her, and to bring her back to KL again to be admitted before we decided where she will be placed permanently. I gave him my blessing and told him to drive carefully. For the second time, I swore to myself to do everything I could to never let her out of my hands again if this trip was successful.
I guess God has not forsaken me after all.... Thank you.
posted by Compulsive Blogger @ 12:53 am
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