Forthnights

Can you cope on your own?

The last I heard, things at home were going on pretty smoothly.

So far, there has not been any relapse in my mothers condition, and according to my brother, he has things well under control.

Since my mother doesn't know how to type e-mails, we have gone through this system whereby she would write out her letter to me, and my brother would type it out and send it to me. I guess, being the typical mom at heart, she couldnt resist sending me a few recipes that she thought I would be able to cook. I will have to take my brother's and her words for it and assume that things are well for the two of them.

However, some things have happened while I am away. For one, our Prime Minister got married last Saturday, it what was the a realy shock/surprise to the nation. The following day, there was a 5 hour downpour that flooded our Dataran Merdeka (where our First Prime Minister declared independence to the nation), the second time in 5 years. It just so happens that the church I attend sits right next to it. The waters reached 1.5m high. I IMed with a friend, and they were all devastated from the descruction caused by the floods. The entire church bookstore was ruined, along with files, computers, a piano and pretty much everything on the first floor. That same friend suffered an asthma attack trying to clear up the mess, and my girlfriend met a small car accident (in the car park) days after I left home.

When I heard all these news, my first reaction was "I should have been home". At least I would have been able to do something about it. But there really is nothing much I can do about except trust that in my absence they would be able to cope.

And as it turns out, everyone is able to cope just fine even without me around.

Its funny when you think about it, becasue when you give someone something to rely on, they seem to become totally dependent on in, and cannot function without it. But take that away, and somehow, some way, that person will cope on their own.

My girlfriend, while I am around, acts like she knows nuts about cars and computers. And everytime something related to it comes out, she just cries "Dear, please help me." and she knows I would come to her rescue. But when I was aways, she met an accident (a small one), and in her proud letter to me, she told me how calm she was in handled the matter, and that she did not panick. She also told me that all of a sudden, she has become Dee IT person to go to whenever there is something wrong with you computer. Compared to her friends, she realised that she actually knows quite a bit about computers now.

I read her letter, beaming with pride and joy. Best part was, she actually credited me for teaching her all those stuff, which in fact I did not. But somehow, I just know that the minute I get back home, she would resume her role, and just let me handle everything for her again. I duno, maybe it has something to do with being a woman, wanting to have a guy she can lean on perhaps?

But I also find myself in almost the same scenario, here in Sheffield. Being new in town, its natural that none of us actually know the directions around town. But I have found (and been told) that I have a rather good sense of direction. I can find my way around a place, provided I have been shown the place once. My friend on the other hand, can't even recognize the streets of KL eventhough he has been there for 4 years. So whenever we walk around town in Sheffield, the question of "which way?" coms flying directly and me, and everyone just shuts off their internal map and follow where I am going. So while I am busy worrying which is the shortest and fastest way to our destination, they are all chatting. Once, I was on the phone, and I let someone else lead, and we ended up lost. But funnily, completely remove me out of the picture, and I found that these guys who supposingly were "bad at directions", managed to find they way home, right in time for dinner.

Either they could smell their way home, or they actually knew how to get home. and all the other times, they were just too lazy to think!

Back to my mom, she did tell me she didnt know how to cope once I was gone. But I am gone now, and I receive a leter from her, saying she is just fine, and now she is even offering me tips on how to cope while I was away.

I guess a lot of times, we tend to underestimate ourselves. Or we rather just depend on someone else when we can.

posted by Compulsive Blogger @ 6:18 pm Comments: 1