Forthnights: Random Thoughts

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I locked my dad’s key in the car, and now we can’t open the car. I’m not sure how we are going to get in. Calling a locksmith is expensive, and breaking the window is out of the question.

My dad got a job today. Its supposed to pay ok, but they want to send him all the way to Johor to work (that’s 300km down south)… He’s going to take it, but I don’t know how he’s going to relocate there, or what its going to cost.

My mom showed me the house bill today. We are 3 months behind in payments. Wondering what will happen if they cut off our electricity and water.

Went caroling practice yesterday night. Brought along my guitar, drove my friend’s car (since he was sick) and started practice, singing all the Christmas carols. Its for the patients in the hospital. It’s the third and last time I’ll be doing it. Went home with sore fingers from an hour plus of playing the guitar. Totally forgot all my problems for an hour, but painful heavy feeling duly return on the way home.

Didn’t want to go home first, went online for 2 hours. Wasn’t in any chatty mood, but had to obligingly chat with some annoying friends. Stuck up bunch of freaks…… So, I said bye bye and just went invisible. Tried putting some music on my blog, but for some reason it wont work…….. tension giler.

Annoyed at a couple of friends, coz they ask me to help them with their assignment, correcting their grammar; but in the end its more like I’m doing the whole damn thing for them. Best part of it all, I haven’t even done mine.

Its been raining every day, and always in the evening. Sometimes the rain feels like breathe of fresh air, cleansing the city. Other times, its just a very annoying hindrance to everything you want to do. Sometimes it makes the mood more sombre/sad, other times, its just water dropping from the sky. Duh. But I think how I feel when the rain comes reflects on how I feel inside. Occasionally, when I’m stuck in the rain, but I’m blazing with sunshine, and I end up singing “Rain drops keep falling on my head…..” but when I’m down and out, and the rain comes, I either say “See? Even God is crying for me.” or more commonly I will say “Great, one more challenge. What? My life isn’t hard enough? Now you me to brave the weather too? What is this, Survivor? Where’s my one million dollars? Coz I’m pretty sure I’m the last one standing.”

I wish I had an answering machine. That way, when people call they would hear “Hi, I’m busy at the moment, raging at life and wallowing in self pity. Kindly leave a message if you owe me money or have taken something of mine. If you are a friend, don’t call, just come. Else, SCRAM!” … HmMm.. that would be fun.

I miss my dog. Or more accurately, I miss my brothers dog. The great thing about dogs is, they are so loyal and loving. Every single day when I come home, he would come running to me, jump on me and lick my face till kingdom come. Dogs cant talk, but their expressions and actions shout out that they’re glad to see you, even if you only left for an hour. When I sit on the couch, he sits beside me, when I lie on the bed, he snuggles with me. I miss that. Dogs truly are mans best friend. Rain or shine, day or night, they are always happy to see you, and the best part is, they always show it openly to you. Something we all should try to do more often. Some prefer cats, saying that they are more sophisticated. Dogs are emotionally shallow they say. Shallow or not, dogs are loyal, and dogs always show genuine interest and obedience to you, and not only when their hungry. I miss that assurance that whatever happens, when I go home, someone will always be happy to see me. The fact that it is the dog and not a human that gives me the assurance only highlights our own human behaviour.