Hope
It’s just so frustrating having to face hard times. Everyone has their fair share of problems. Maybe it’s just me, but I strongly suspect that I have been given a more generous portion of it to others as it were. I’m not shy to say that I resent the situation that we are in right now. I resent the fact that we don’t have enough money, I resent the fact that my family is in a total mess. I resent the fact that after all this year of trouble and problems, we are no better, in fact worse of that we have ever been. Why can’t things just improve? Why can’t the problems go away or eventually be resolved? Why is it that no matter how hard we try, some problems just seem to plague us for life?It is supposed to be that what cant kill you will only make you stronger? Who made that up anyway? Well, I’m not murdered by my problems yet, have I been any stronger? I don’t think so. On the contrary, the problems seem to just drag you down, low enough to make you feel that life is nothing but an endless stream of problems waiting to wash you away into your misery, but never low enough to just outright kill you, therefore forcing you to just linger on in existence. But don’t worry, I’m not about to slit my throat.
Up till recently, I held the belief that everyone goes through bad spells. When my financial worries started the beginning of the year, I comforted myself, thinking that this things happen, and its just a matter of time before things pick up again and what ever problems we face become manageable. But things just went downhill from there and till today, nothing much has improved. I have since that come to accept that what we are going through now is more that just a bad spell. I never thought it possible for us to become this tight financially, but here we are, and no one has any idea how long it will continue to be so. It sounds funny maybe, but when money is an issue, almost everything else is affected. Suddenly, problems are so hard to deal with, problems are beyond our means to manage because with money comes options, and without money there is no options available to solve your problems. Your hands become tied up, and no matter how hard you try, you cant break free.
Everything just seems to come rushing down together. Like a damp being released, and its waters come gushing out, sweeping and destroying everything in its path. In the midst you stand, with no choice but to stand firm and hold on, or be swept away to meet whatever end awaits you. What do you have to help you make your stand against this current? A current that threatens to sweep away all that you hold precious around you and destroy your spirit and your sanity. As roots are to a tree, only strength of character will see that you do not be swept away. Only strength of character will help you keep your sanity when you see the world that you know come tumbling about you, when the world that you know so well and love so much start to change, start to be swept away by the current and be lost to you. It is only through some reservoir of strength from within can we cope and accept what we are going through and make sure that we have what it takes to survive. This much I realize. I don’t know how long this current that sweeps through our lives will last. I don’t know how much more of what we have will be lost to us. I pray to God to give me the strength to keep my footing and not be overwhelmed it. I pray that God will guide me and help me in this bottomless pit that I find myself in. Most of all, I pray that He forgives me for the sins that I have committed and to let no harm come to the people that I love and are dear to me.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that the suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3&4)
For the hope of a better future, may God bless me with perseverance and the strength of character to see my problems through.
posted by Compulsive Blogger @ 9:39 am
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